RD Bowls A Googly – Sweet Sixteen Letter To Self

by ViceUnVersa
(viceunversa.blogspot.com)

S ome facts I wish the both of us knew at 16. There is many, I’ll concentrate on the most important: All the moola about masturbation is not true. However times you shake it, it does not fall off. So have fun.

You will smoke your first BRistol soon, detest, please don’t. It’s going to bug you for life and prevent you from really enjoying the sports you like to play and are good at. It will also develop in you a persistent cough for life, that’s not sexy.

A/L’s – Work a wee bit harder; make sure you make it to Law Faculty. You will soon realise you have a fantastic personality. You have good looks, you write well and you are a brilliant public speaker. Something we should have known at 16, Uni is fun, the real hard work are the A/L’s, so make it work.

USA – However brilliant it may sound, don’t go. PLEASE DON’T GO. It will alter your perspective in life and develop in you disrespect for all women. This is not a good thing. USA will teach you many bad things, seriously. What you learn in USA will mold you into what you are today. I wish we didn’t go.

Ruani – You would have met her by now. By hook or by crook marry her. She’s the one that got away, your true love. Be patient and don’t be an asshole with her. I swear she’s the one.

Ballet, Piano and Violin – Continue these activities. Don’t knock these off as pussyboy activity. Dude, they are major chick magnets. I swear, trust me, and trust us.

Chick – Any [sex] is worth eight pence. No more, no less. Whilst respecting every woman you meet as they have the fantastic potential to be ‘mothers’, remember a [sex] is no more or no less – Eight pence.

Well that’s all I believe. I know what lies ahead for you, so I envy us. Take care and don’t forget about the Bristol thing.

More details: viceunversa.blogspot.com