Dear Aunty

Dear Aunty Pat,

I’m 22 years of age. One of my best friends is a boy I studied with in school. I don’t have a steady boyfriend at the moment. Although I was in a relationship recently it didn’t work out. The boy in my school and I talk with each other regularly. His latest girlfriend has taken a violent dislike to me, and I feel really uncomfortable when I’m together with them. Recently when she was alone with me, she asked me to lay off her boyfriend and not to keep bugging him with calls and FaceBook comments, etc. I was shocked and told her I am just an old friend of his and have no romantic feeling towards him. She said she hoped so. When I told him what happened, he just laughed it off and said she must be jealous of our friendship. But now I feel uncomfortable about it. Do you think I should not keep in touch with him often? Am I being intrusive? Please tell me what you think, aunty.


Dear K.,

I personally think if your friend doesn’t mind keeping in touch with you, I don’t see why you should slow your friendship down with him. It’s only natural that his girl will be resentful of your close relationship with him. You will have to win her over and convince her that your relationship with him is purely platonic and she has no cause for worry. I can’t see anything wrong with having friends of the opposite sex too. Include her in some of your activities with other friends of yours. If you want to be friends with him, you will have to accept his girlfriend too. So make a special effort but if this doesn’t work, then he will have to deal with her complaints!

Aunty Pat.


Dear Aunty,

I broke off a relationship with a lady about four months ago. I told her it just wasn’t working out and we were constantly fighting about something. I met another lady about one and a half months ago but my first lady friend just won’t leave me alone, she keeps calling and texting and however much I tell her to stop she just won’t. She cooks stuff and delivers it to my home, buys me shirts and movies and stuff like that and send it over. My new friend is getting irritated and now she says she’s wondering if I’m encouraging all this attention! I have called this lady in front of her so she could hear me telling her to stop. Can you please tell me how to escape from this situation?

Harassed guy.

Dear Harassed Guy,

For heaven’s sake, you can stop answering her calls and texts as a start. Then you can return her gifts to her. If she continues to do this, call her family or friends and ask them to please tell her to leave you alone. If she’s working, tell a close colleague of hers of her boss to please advise her. This might shock her into stopping what she’s being doing. If all these don’t work, you might have to take more drastic action, such as a legal order or a police complaint.

Aunty Pat.

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