Aunty Pat

Dear Aunty Pat,

Teachers are so much in the news these days, but it is not about the noble vocation they have chosen, instead about the way they tackle pupils in their charge.

I have 3 children attending the same school and it is my Alma Mater too.
The one in the middle school is reluctant to go to school after an incident which has humiliated her.

One morning a few minutes before the school van arrived, my daughter said that she had forgotten to tell me that they were asked to bring a bouquet of flowers to school, I don’t have a florist close by and anyway they wouldn’t be open at 6.45 am. So I did what I thought was the next best thing, I made a nice bunch of flowers from my garden, tied it up with a pretty bow and gave it to my daughter.

She came home in and burst into tears. On inquiry, she said that the teacher had given one look at the bunch of flowers and thrown it into the waste paper basket. She had also said, “Your mother being a past pupil also, can’t she afford to get a bouquet from a florist?”
It was a nice bunch of flowers, Aunty Patto, only it lacked a professional touch..
What shall I do now, shall I complain to the Principal?
Please advise me.

Thank You,
Angry Parent

 

Hi Angry Parent,

No, most definitely do not complain to the Principal. This will antagonise this teacher who may take it out on your daughter because she is sure to be pulled up. Unfortunately there are lots of people like this teacher around, who have a false sense of values. Obviously she has no genuine feeling for the children she is guiding, because only an insensitive person would act the way she has done in front of the rest of the class.

Of course your daughter would have felt humiliated, because kids can be cruel and definitely some of them would have made some snide remarks to her. If I were you, I would meet this teacher and apologise on your daughter’s behalf and tell her what happened. Adopt a conciliatory tone (think of your daughter however annoyed you are) and explain that she’s now refusing to come to class.
You can also say that she has now learnt a lesson and will never forget what she was asked to do. Say you are sorry the flowers didn’t pass muster. Unless she’s absolutely unfeeling, I’m sure she will feel rather sheepish and might try to make amends with your daughter. Remember that your daughter has to go to this school daily and so be very tactful.

Aunty Pat

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Dear Aunty Pat,

Recently when my wife was in the shower, a text message came in on her mobile and I checked it out. It was an unknown number and when I read it, it was obviously from a man. I realised that I was supposed to be at a meeting that was cancelled. I quickly checked her Inbox and there were several other messages from this same person.

There was obviously something going on. I was shocked and hurt, because I thought we were quite happy together these past six years. I pretended to be busy on my computer when she came out and didn’t mention anything. What shall I do, am I to confront her or else secretly check this out? I feel so depressed but I haven’t told anyone about this. Please advise me as to what I should do.
P.J.

Dear P.J.,

You have to ask her who this is and what is going on, because you deserve to know. Sometimes women get bored and just have harmless flirtations to spice up their lives. That doesn’t necessarily mean she has even met up with him or that this is a serious relationship. Either way you have to know or everything will fester inside you and your relationship with her will suffer and that won’t be a good thing from your point of view. So ask her calmly to explain what’s going on. You have to know either way and there’s no point loosing sleep over something you have no control over. So get it over with and hope for the best.

Aunty Pat

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Are you in need of advice? Do you, perhaps, have something that’s bothering you which you can’t share with your friends and family? - Write to auntypatto@gmail.com

1 Comment for “Aunty Pat”

  1. Duminda N Jayatileke

    I live overseas & if a teacher threw flowers at my child, she would be asked to apologise to me & my child. What false sense of values that has befallen this country which is struggling to survive through poverty & hope. shame.

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