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Fake Prophets And Prophesies

  • These prophesies are not being made for demonstration of their visionary insight or their godlike propensities – like prophets of yore did. The main objective of today’s fakes is to climb the political ladder
  • A political prophet ruling the media roost keeps predicting almost daily that the best thing that could ever happen to this Thrice blessed Island is to have Gota as president and brother Mahinda as prime minister
  • The new prophet has an ideological base on which he hopes to construct the new Rajapaksa civilisation under the brand name of Smart Patriotism

President Maithripala Sirisena, Former President Mahinda Rajapaksa and Former Defence Secretary Gotabhaya Rajapaksa

The Biblical adage of ‘Prophets not being recognised in their own country’, today can be well appreciated in Sri Lanka. Their prophesies have gone wrong.

By prophets, we mean the political kind, not our traditional prophets, the astrologers, who are  given the formidable task of predicting our whole lives, results of wars, cricket matches, matching couples horoscopes and of course elections. We are referring to exclusive political prophets: those who call themselves political scientists, psychologists, political analysts, political journalists and the like who assail us daily in the media with their prophesies.

 

Sirisena and prophets

Did any such prophet put down in black and white – in their favourite newspapers they contribute to – that the dark horse from Polonnaruwa, Maithripala Sirisena, will pip the all-time favourite Mahinda Rajapaksa at the post on January 15, 2015? We are not referring to political obfuscation in language used – as George Orwell said – ‘to make lies sound truthful and murder respectable and give an appearance of solidity to pure wind’ – but to any direct and clear prediction on the outcome of the election. We would certainly be delighted to be informed of any such prophesy.

 

Prophets and profits

by Gamini Weerakoon

With the expanding electronic media constantly drilling in ‘information’, ‘ informed opinion’ and misinformation not only on radio, TV and the press  but even on mobile phones, media prophets, pundits are having a field day and the gullible public is being informed or misinformed not only what the future would be, but also what it should be. These prophesies are not being made for demonstration of their visionary insight or their godlike propensities – like prophets of yore did. The main objective of today’s fakes is to climb the political ladder.

Our false prophets not only prophesy but preach to regular audiences of the media. These prophets have virtually taken over some media organisations or replaced some editors and are perorating to gullible readerships on a daily basis, reducing once reputed national newspapers to political rags. All this is permissible in a Yahapalanaya democracy but does not happen in an ideal democracy, where statements made have to be proven or at least be credible.

 

Tests for prophets

The acid test for the genuineness of political prophet should be the success he had made of his own career. Foreknowledge of events through his perceptive political analyses, information sources and canny foresight should have placed him in the highest political rungs and not being left to hawk unrealistic, confused, newfangled theories for desperate leaders lost in the political wilderness. It is of course the democratic right of the conman to dupe and it is the democratic freedom of gullible leaders to be duped. But the gullible public is also duped.

The well-known political leap-frogging history of notable leap frogs (gas gembo in Sinhala) do not inspire confidence.

A political prophet ruling the media roost keeps predicting almost daily that the best thing that could ever happen to this Thrice blessed Island is to have Gota as president and brother Mahinda as prime minister. Whether it is the constitutional amendment barring Mahinda aiya being president or Gota malli being a better candidate is not made clear but it leaves open the question what this magnificent twosome did for nine long years at the helm. ‘They won the War’ will be the answer which leaves open the question what tens of thousands poor soldiers and officers who perished in the battle fields do for a near 30-long-year period?

What did the two-man combo do for the rest of the six years of peace? Gota did pave pavements and made walkabouts for Colombo 7 women while Mahinda built Mahinda Rajapaksa monuments at the cost of billions of dollars without having the foggiest notion of how he is going to pay back his Chinese debtors or whether his white elephants will earn dollars.

The gullible public needs to be told by the prophet how his magic formula of VSOA – Very Special Old Arrack – in new media plastic bottles will work miracles to bring back glories of the Dutu Gemunu era.

 

Ideological base

The new prophet has an ideological base on which he hopes to construct the new Rajapaksa civilisation under the brand name of Smart Patriotism. Gota is to be the leading light of this School or University, comprising academics, professionals, entrepreneurs and the like. Gota’s qualification: ‘He has a respect for professional expert opinion’. He also has a degree from the Colombo University (honoris causa). That is for ‘The War’ about which Field Marshal Sarath Fonseka complains he was unjustly deprived of.

Gota can be the Chancellor of this campus but if the prophet attempts to make a run for it he may be out by his ear as what happened to him in Geneva.

This institution can have faculties which state universities or even SAITM do not provide. Some of the faculties we suggest are:

Faculty of Paving Pavements and Women Walkabouts: Visiting Professor and Chancellor Dr. Col. Gota Rajapaksa.

Faculty of Family Planning and Power Distribution: Dr. (Honoris Causa) Mahinda Rajapaksa.

Faculty of Vanishing Assets and Poverty Alleviation: Basil Rajapaksa.

Faculty for Playboy Activities and Ministerial Interference and Empty Stadia: Namal Rajapaksa.

Faculty for Extreme Nuisance, International Conspiracies and Death Fasts without Casualties: Wimal Weerawansa.

Faculty for Sustained Gibberish, Conning the Gullible, Pol Kudu Accents and Political Climbing: Dr. Dayan Jayatilleke.

The potential of this institution to be a leading University in the world is immense. Getting it recognised (If the Rajapaksa’s are resurrected) is great. Gota got the Kotelawala Defence Academy medical faculty recognised even before the buildings were up.

1 Comment for “Fake Prophets And Prophesies”

  1. Nimal

    What a load of rubbish?

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