4th July, 2004  Volume 10, Issue 51



















Bouquets and brickbats

When Satellite hit 59, the occasion indeed was another historic notch in her colourful life span. It was a day for kisses and wishes and when Satty made her entry into cabinet the day being a Wednesday, she was greeted with a large bouquet of flowers held jointly by the partners to the sandhanaya - the Pee Em and Wije-lion, the rathu sahodaraya representing fisheries. A special bouquet from Mangy was also the order of cabinet that day. Well well, happy, happy birthday ole girl - this rag of course has no bouquets for thee, but those brickbats we sure will keep floating aplenty. Hee! Hee!


Food for thought

Birthday and all, Satty will be hard pressed to mend her ways despite her growing years. After a long and arduous wait those khakied types who were stuck like glue on the lower rungs of the depo finally got their promos. But Satty is never one to miss a trick. And she was not about to let the commission that is police take the credit. So instead, she organised a party all her own and invited the khakied kind including those from the commission that is police.

But Satty as usual was going to be three hours late. Determined to keep those traps the cops like to yap shut, she doled out a buth packet to each and every Johnny of the khakied kind no sooner they set their polished boots upon her step. The lady sure knows the way to a man's heart is via his tummy, even if it is thru a buth packet, eh? Atta girl!


Man about town

And at the function for the cops who pray was there large as life but ole Nihal Karu for whom the courts have issued a warrant for arrest. The wanted git was master of ceremonies no less and the cops had to grin and bear instead of pulling out that warrant and slamming the man then and there in shackles. The warrant of course like the scarlet pimpernel is another story - there one day gone the next.

The former PSD toughie was not manacled even when he arrived with Satty all the way from ole Blighty. Instead he was whisked out free as a bird via the lounge that is Vee Eye Pee and is walking around having the last laugh. Now who said only Satty is above the law eh? No way sister, there are others too, provided you cling hard enough onto that sari pota!


Top favourite

And the stories on these cops will never end. A little bird whispers that the head cop for the Cee Eye Dee has been ousted from his rightful place at a conference that is Interpol and instead we hear the man of the hour Punya was asked to go. The reason being Punya junior is in love with the Eye Gee's duwa and family ties are impending. So Punya senior is in for a bright tomorrow as long as sonna boy keeps those love lines busy. Hmm.


Clown act

The Clown Prince is never tired of tripping on his toes and acting the clown. This time he announced those serving types at the Bee-O-Eye would not be allowed a free trip to the Lion City. But who gave this man the power to crack the whip? After all we all know how he took his servants no less on world tours and how all those other trips were paid for by ole Patty whose bro the Clown Prince has now ousted from the Bee-O-Eye. The Clown Prince can sure give the thick hide of a rhino a run any day eh?


The wizard

With governance at a standstill since the advent of the sandhanaya,  jokes about our Satty are being released to the market fast and furious.

Satty, the story goes was observed by daughter Yaso howling, hollering and jumping for joy in her Presidential office, claiming she was the greatest.

Thinking big Mama was jumping for joy at her taking the Hippocratic oath, Yaso gently said it was no big deal. Shouted big Mama, "no big deal? I just finished this complicated jigsaw puzzle which said 3-5 years. I did it in one month!"

Guess that explains the plight of the nation, eh! Hmmm.

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