The few things the University of
Mattakkuliya didn't teach

Darling Ma-hinder

Well dear it's Christmas and all that and the goose is getting fat and so is Thelma if you care to know. Not that Thelma is in the gravy at all these days so much so she hardly even gets to indulge in an occasional bit of Christmas cheer in the form of a little something in my fruit punch. Hard times, sweetie. Hard times and getting harder by the minute.

Speaking of sobering up, I've been mulling over what you hinted about the sober chap on Hulftsdorp Hill going great guns to the finish. I'll be the first to admit that despite reading law in the University of Mattakkuliya from whence I passed out Summa Cum Laude or Louder which ever you prefer, I haven't quite got a toe hold on the nitty gritties of the law argued upon in that very august assembly presided over by none other than the grand panjandrum of justice S.N. you-no-hoo.

And speaking of Summa Cum Laude wasn't it none other than everybody's favourite comedian Merv the Perv who graduate also Summa blah blah from some alternative joint.and got himself a doctorate. .No wait a mo.was that Summa Cum Laude or simply Summa.

I may be wrong darling but I have a sneaky feeling honorary means - you haven't bally worked for it. Sat down long hours with a frown on your brow and a wet towel on your head steeped knee deep in a basin of warm water cramming and writing and what not.

If only someone had told Thellie about the honorary degree. Well too late now I suppose. It's just like that dog in a manger Rat Wicks to get himself appointed to a sub committee to abolish deshabandus right when Thellie was ripe for an honorary degree. 

A little birdie tells me you yourself have over 10 honorary titles dearie. Tch Tch what would the Rat Wicks sub committee say darling?

But I digress. It is about your cautious lament to the judiciary that I most want to chat to you about. You say that it is unbecoming for people who at one time stoned the houses of judges and collected files on them to now toddle along to the court house, which was at one time as far as they were concerned, merely a large dart board of sorts or the forehead of Goliath - only fit to receive sticks and stones to them.  They should be estopped from going before these sober chaps and filing fundamental rights applications helter skelter is your beef.

Does it mean darling that you feel that he who hath no sin must cast the first stone? Or perchance you want to warn these blokes that those in glass houses musn't throw stones? Either way the stony motif is making me for some reason quite hungry for a piece of coconut rock.

Here's the thing sweetie. That stone story belongs with Stonehenge. I mean to say darling even the perpetrator of that particular episode is pushing a daisy if not two.

But that's not all you said, eh? A little miffed I wager about the price of fuel potentially coming down once the Chief you-no-hoo on Hulftsdorp does his magic you-no-what come tomorrow. Not that a genuine effort to lessen the burden on Thellie and her fuel bill can ever be likened to a terrorist act but that is what you said.Shame on you dear.

You must learn to cut your coat according to your bally loin cloth. There you are on the one hand flying high with Mihin and wasting funds on rushing around to the Vatican with a delegation of 50 and then.and then..the slightest whiff of any help for the Paradisians and there you are sniffling about it in your little corner instead of rejoicing in the fact that your people can come out of their Dickensian stupor and live a little.

Aaany hoo, down the grapevine also came the news that you had further cause to lament and beat your breast. One supposes that given the slightest chance you may have donned sack cloth and ashes as well. The sober chaps on the hill you said are not elected by the people but you are. The SCs on the H you said not being elected by the people didn't have to answer to the people.

I assure you darling there is a rub in your argument. What the rub is I cannot quite pin point in any immediate way having taken two shots of a chillie vodka and swallowed an oyster, but it will all come back to me. I didn't place my feet on a wet rug and wrap a warm towel on my head for nothing.

Yes. here it is..Just a minute...oh yes it's coming back to me now, these chaps darling on the hill. Isn't it you who appoint them? Correct me if I'm wrong but if you are elected by the people and you appoint the sober chaps then by extension aren't they appointed by the people? Hard to say dear Thellie is a bit hazy on that one.

As I said the University of Mattakkuliya didn't teach everything.                    

Tara for now
And a Merry Xmas.
Thellie Bellie