Focus

      Sri Lankan suffering, Sri Lankan compassion

I visited some warzone kids at a hospital. They've come here for treatment. Good kids, bad wounds. The nurses and doctors are doing a great job, bless them. I saw a little boy, couldn't be more than three, a double amputee, but can still coax a smile. A little kid sitting nearby had burn wounds all over his chest.

 He was shivering, in pain. I can't speak Tamil for toffee, but this one baby was balancing on her mother's knee, just looking at me. So I looked back, and smiled. Hard to look into her eyes and think about who or what or why. Hard to blame anyone or make any moral calculations or anything. She's just a little kid. And she's Sri Lankan too.

I came with a local hero, in my opinion. She believes that those kids and families are Sri Lankan  too and that they deserve our full compassion and support. I suppose many of us would say that, but she does something about it.

She's been visiting them for weeks and they know her. I was just a tourist there, but I could see that they appreciate the simple time and care this woman has put in. She's Sinhalese, but she's reaching out to them, and I think that makes a big difference. Just to know that we care. That they are not forgotten. That they are Sri Lankan too.

Celebration and suffering

I know it must gall that it seems like the south is celebrating while these people suffer. I watch local music videos and they're full of martial songs now, scenes of singing interspersed with guns firing, artillery firing, soldiers with bullets around their chest.

OK. I support the troops. Our men and women have done yeoman service to push the nihilistic, sociopathic LTTE back. I also understand that we are fighting in civilian areas, and that this has very real consequences. The LTTE using human shields and firing on fleeing refugees certainly does not help.

However, I do not glory in war, especially as a Buddhist whose first precept is to abstain from taking life. I mean, I'm a terrible Buddhist but I at least feel guilt. I understand that killing happens, often in my name, and I even support it sometimes.

However, I see no particular glory in war. Necessity perhaps, but seeing artillery and gunfire in music videos honestly nauseates me. Those bombs and bullets land somewhere. One day I saw a martial video with guns a' blazing. The next day I saw a four year old kid with a bullet in his back.

Beyond politics

Seeing those kids, I couldn't even think about the war in all its historical and political context. It just seemed so far away. A father had been waiting in the same old clothes, covered in his daughter's blood. My friend brought him a shirt and a sarong. The kids were malnourished so she brought vitamins and milk. She brought coloring sets, stickers, and they showed us their drawings. It's just suns and stuff, they like Spiderman stickers. They're just kids. They need diapers and soap.

I'm not saying stop the war, start the war, devolve, evolve, whatever. I can't even think about that anymore. I honestly don't know. I just think that we have to feel compassion for these people. Because they are human, they are Sri Lankan, and they are like you and me. Those kids are like your kids or my kids and their parents love them. You meet them and they're just little kids and you want to take care of them.

I think it is vitally important to let the people of the north know that we care and that we have not forgotten them. That we do not revel in their suffering but share it as fellow Sri Lankans, and as mothers, fathers, daughters and sons. I felt like a fool handing out biscuits to these people like I'm deaf, dumb and Duminda, but that's all I know to do. And all aid and expression is tightly controlled so there really isn't that much I can do. But I can control how I feel, and how I meditate, and what I say and what I do.

Towards compassion

I'm not saying I'm especially good or make a difference, but I am trying to feel. I think my friend makes a difference, but she's of a different calibre than me. I just feel bad and can't do much more than smile, and pray. But I can write. I can say that I deeply regret the suffering of this war and feel compassion for everyone affected. As the Buddha said:

Victory breeds hatred,

The defeated live in pain,

Happily the peaceful live,

Giving up victory and defeat.

I don't even know about the war anymore. I just know that Sri Lankan kids are hurt. I know that Sri Lankan soldiers are sacrificing and that a lot of people are living in ignorance and hate. I don't even know what to do besides get my own mind right, and in my mind these people are all Sri Lankan. I care about their suffering, and I have not forgotten them. I hope you feel the same way, and that in whatever way you can let them know. They are not forgotten, they are not alone. They are Sri Lankan.

If you'd like to communicate with Northern Sri Lankans affected by war you can send letters - care of The Sunday Leader, 24, Katukurunduwatte Road, Ratmalana Sri Lanka or editor@thesundayleader.lk. Please include 'IDPs' in the subject line. Suggested content is 'Hello, my name is, I understand what you're going through and you're not alone.' A group will try to get as many translated and delivered to affected people as possible.