|
The
entrance to the beach festival |
By Minal Wickematunge
and
Piyumi Buddhakorala
It was
the talk of the town. Everyone was buzzing with
excitement about the Hikkaduwa Beach Festival which
happened last week. Not only was all of Colombo booking
hotels well in advance but so were many Maldivians, who
were flying down to Sri Lanka especially for this event.
For those of you who did not have a chance to be there,
we were there to give you the scoop!
The
entertainment commenced on Thursday, with the much
anticipated “Drum Festival.” On entering Hikkaduwa, one
was almost immediately aware of the pumping music
playing at every nook and cranny of the town. The roads
were packed with stirring crowds who seemed excited to
finally be there. We were then treated to a spectacular
fireworks display and watched in awe as the sky lit up
in an amazing array of colours.
Having
been at the festival in 2008, it was noted that the Drum
Festival was one of the previous highlights. Therefore
we entered with high expectations. The location itself
seemed unchanged, other than the odd food stall,
including Chinese, which soon became the favourite for
schools of people who needed re-energising between the
events.
The opening ceremony
Whilst
the drums were supposed to start beating at 9 p.m, this
was delayed due to bad weather. Impatiently waiting we
managed to squeeze our way to the front in order to
watch the opening ceremony. Once it finally started we
were gloriously presented with many fusion dance acts
that were sadly lacking in coordination.
Soon
this too was stopped due to a heavy downpour which led
us back to the hotel now wet and utterly disappointed.
Yet we still had hope and listened intently for the
drums to start once more. When they finally did, we
headed back and watched the crowds pumping to some
exceptional beats with some of our finest local talent.
However there were many foreign acts which began to
wander off to some acid jazz — albeit very good — it was
not quite in line with the theme of the night. When
asking around whether people enjoyed themselves at the
Drum Festival the next day, the general consensus seemed
to be that it was rather unsatisfactory.
The festivities
Still,
hoping for a better night more vehicles packed with
people drove in on Friday morning. The festivities and
pumping music carried on non stop throughout the wee
hours of the morning, right through the entire day.
There was an array of different activities including a
sand castle building competition to a rugby tournament
as well.
The
beaches were crowded with sun lovers eating roti and
enjoying the atmosphere in general. In this sense the
mornings were a roaring success with people soaking up
the sun and enjoying the activities planned out.
Friday
night was the beach rave which had many DJs from all
across the globe. The whole beach came alive with
electro music that the crowd seemed to love. The only
complaint would be that the dance floor was jam-packed.
Overall the night was exciting with an electrifying line
up of music spinning till well past sunrise the next
day.
Come
Saturday morning, one finds yet more people making their
way to Hikkaduwa to join in the festivities. For those
who missed out on the previous two nights, it was a
relief to hear people commenting on how unsatisfactory
the other nights had been.
Theme parties
Expecting a much better night with the theme parties,
the crowd gets busy with their free evening swims at
Amaya Reef Hotel and the chocolate and banana roti from
the “No. 1 Roti Shop in Hikkaduwa.” Even though
activities had been planned out during the day time,
most preferred to stay in their hotel rooms or go for a
quick swim and gear themselves up for the night ahead.
The
Galle Road lights up with much noise. One thinks that
this is how
Colombo
night life should be, with the whole stretch of
Hikkaduwa teeming with people and shops open round the
clock! You will find people walking about searching for
their friends lodged at different hotels and popping
into each and every hotel lined up by the road to see
which party is the most “happening.” For the festive
season is not limited to parties by the ‘Hikka fest’
alone, every hotel and tiny joint you may come across
has a party of their own.
People
have an array of venues to choose from! We did the smart
thing of having started off at Coral Gardens with some
quick bites to pump up the energy, danced a bit to the
‘oldies’ on the empty dance floor with two other
friends, made our way to the theme parties round about
11.30 pm and found that it was packed with the familiar
faces of the Colombo crowd and the not so familiar faces
of the beach boys you knew would try and pass a cheeky
hand across your bottom!
Music was great
The
themes for the four parties were; Space, Paradise,
House and at the far corner the Hip Hop Party. Music was
great but as expected the dance floors were insufficient
even with four different floors to accommodate all. But
this did not deter these party animals.
One
finds people climbing onto speakers and hanging around
by the beach and the waves. Speaking of which, moment to
revel over that please! The sea; it looked amazing that
night. The moon was shining bright in its half crescent
and the water sparkled beneath its light. People were
literally everywhere. The parties were so tightly packed
that one goes close to the waves to get across to the
adjacent parties.
1 a.m,
3 a.m, 6 a.m, 8 a.m and the parties are still ongoing!
Of
course one does find many strewn on the sand after a
heavy binge and too much dancing. Others with much more
stamina would still be waving their hands around to the
beat that never ends during this season. Wanting to make
our way back to Amaya Reef we use the beach to walk the
2 kms. Passing many abandoned parties we see ahead of us
one party that is still alive with the crowd even at 9
am — Mambos. Oh right! That was the not so smart move we
made — not having checked out the place — the hottest
club in Hikka!
After
which one finds many making their way to the roti shop
for yet more crepes and early morning breakfast. Most of
the crowd leaves on that Sunday morning as did I.
Although the fest was to go on till Monday, many were up
and gone with the weekend coming to an end.
Having
spoken to some people who happened to be at the Sunday
and Monday festivities one finds that it was not all
that fun as the previous nights.
“ Most
people stayed on till 6 or 7 in the evening.” Miyuru
comments. “By around midnight there were hardly any
people left.”
One
also learns that Hikkaduwa fest this year was more of a
place to be in order to hang out with one’s friends. The
parties were not appreciated as much as last year and
the beach boy count only grows — which means only one
thing, the girls stay clear of those areas. This
inevitably increases the ratio of boys and the party
does not turn out as it should.
Either
way the friends will stay in their little cliques and if
upon finding the parties not to their liking, will make
their way back to their hotel rooms to have a drink or
two and a party of their own.
This
was common many times over this year with a lot of
people, we found.
All in
all, the Hikka fest was a success. It calls upon all
ages and circles to come together and enjoy a good dance
beat or two. The Colombo night life lovers were
transferred to Hikkaduwa in the span of a few days. It
was great to walk the streets to find many you know,
which is rare even back home in Colombo.
The music was good, the food was great and the meet up
with one’s friends was fabulously worth it. So of
course, despite the increase in beach boys, the not so
innovative party themes that ended up dividing the crowd
and certain instances where more planning was
necessary, I await next year for this festive season,
perhaps to go on all days, as Hikkaduwa even today,
arguably remains the best party place in Sri Lanka for
one and all.
Colombo lacks hangout spots
|
Galle Face Green
and (inset) Vihara Maha Devi Park |
By
Piyumi Buddhakorala
Four
friends are to meet to ‘hang out’ somewhere in Colombo.
Possibly a place with affordable food and a couch or two
to relax in. Any ideas? Where about in Colombo can one
go if one is to spend some reasonable quality time with
one’s friends?
Most
people don’t realise this but Colombo has a serious
shortage of places to ‘chill.’ I took upon myself the
task of going about the typical hang out spots only to
find that it comes with a huge price tag. Either of
expensive short eats or limitations on how relaxed one
can be.
Coffee
Stop, Crescat, Galle Face, Excel World, Coffee Bean and
Tea Leaf, Vihara Maha Devi Park, Sky Lounge, Buba or
simply the beach are only a selected few of the places
available for leisure time. Coffee Stop is of course in
a five star hotel, which means one cannot wear the
everyday flip flops or shorts even after dark.
Too grand
The
food is amazingly cheap and the drinks, not so much.
Therefore one cannot penalise the place, as it is too
grand for the ordinary man in Sri Lanka. Crescat is more
a place to eat. If one does not wish to eat, one should
not hang around that area.
Even
if one does wish it, a plate of rice without any curries
from the Chinese joint will cost a minimum of Rs.110.
Galle Face was much better off in the olden days where
one was able to walk around the ground, eating ice cream
and playing ball. Today, the restrictions brought in
during the war time have still not been lifted. One can
only walk on the sides of the pavement, with hardly any
food stalls to enjoy as they once did.
Excel
World is one of many places people opt for when in need
of good entertainment. But as always, clever
entertainment in Sri Lanka comes with a huge price tag.
One is charged Rs.60 for one hour’s parking. Of course
one needs more than an hour to be completely
entertained. Entrance fee is Rs.10; Bowling will cost
Rs.200 a game per person; a game of pool will be Rs.350
for an hour and Lazer Runner will cost Rs.100 for five
minutes, believe it if you will!
Paintball will take up to Rs.800 per hour, after which a
mere plate of French fries from Thai Express will cost
Rs.200. So if you think about it, leisure time will take
up a minimum of Rs.1000 per person! Maybe staying at
home day in and day out on one’s holiday does seem a
more sensible choice, even if one will eventually die of
absolute boredom.
Vihara
Maha
Devi
Park
is your ideal leisure place. Entrance is free. It has
landscaped walkways, ice cream carts around and plenty
of benches for one to sit and enjoy the scenery of tall
green trees and the occasional dog sleeping about.
Yet
why don’t many go there? You do find the occasional
lovers hand in hand sitting on a tree bark, slurping
their ice cream, children enjoying the slides and a man
or two sleeping on the benches. I for one would not opt
for such a place to be with my friends; the ice cream is
of questionable taste and the benches are either
occupied by a homeless man sleeping on it or do not look
‘usable.’
Hefty price range!
It’s a
shame that many youngsters do no use it as it is a
typical hang out spot, quite like
Lester Square
in London, Central Park in New York or even English
Garden in Munich.
If
Vihara Maha Devi is not an option, then neither is
Commons. It too would have been perfect to sit and enjoy
another’s company if not for the hefty price range! A
spicy chicken sandwich is Rs.295, for the vegetarians it
is Rs.280 and a hot chocolate is Rs.210. Not forgetting
that one is charged a 10% service charge plus government
taxes.
So
when you order a meal for Rs.350 you will end up paying
Rs.400 plus for it! Coffee Bean is no different, the
prices are sky high. A stroll on the beach in Buba and a
plate of rice and some drinks afterwards would cost one
Rs.1000 or more.
Hefty price rang
Colombo
is indeed in shortage of simple places to hang out. Most
places have expensive beverages; so one usually ends up
buying a simple water bottle which one can do even at
home. It would be great if more places such as Vihara
Maha Devi Park would spring up as people become more
sociable and it will give Colombo an overall happy
outlook with people taking strolls and having picnics
here and there, without the usual vehicles blaring their
horns to get about their business.
At the
end of the day the four friends are out of options on
places to go as leisure time in
Colombo is unfortunately too dear for the common man and woman!
The reality of reality shows in Sri
Lanka
By Azi
Sheriff
American Idol - The mother of all reality shows. Dancing
With The Stars – The fast becoming leader of reality.
Let’s
face it, mankind may not be cannibals, well at least not
generally, but they love to watch disappointment, shock,
anguish, hurt and of course victory on the faces of
fellow humans who willingly subject themselves to being
humiliated, ridiculed and sometimes scorned, in order to
win some title, which generally does not materialise
into much financial or emotional gain, with the odd
exception.
That’s
the very foundation on which reality shows have been
created and grown into a powerful genre of television.
Added to that now, is the ability to choose the fate of
the contestants, and you have American Idol, Dancing
With The Stars, So You Think You Can Dance, Celebrity
Apprentice and the list goes on.
Piracy is accepted
Sri
Lanka being a country where piracy is accepted in the
same way parents choosing your life partner is, it comes
as no surprise that our gurus of copying have “me too’d”
most successful reality shows and made great financial
returns out of them. The contestants are those who are
desperate for stardom.
Some
are at the introduction stage of their celebrity life
cycle while the others are at the declining stage,
trying to make one final comeback before disappearing in
to the wilderness forever. Whether its dancing, singing
or simply doing nothing, there is a reality show to
capture the unstimulated minds of the Sri Lankan masses.
Frankly speaking the media giants behind these shows
must be commended on the success they have achieved in
introducing this genre of television to our rigid,
conventional thinking culture. I mean phone
manufacturers have not been able to make the mobile an
accepted device taken to schools by students, to perform
basic functions such as contact and networking, which
are the driving forces behind human growth.
And
yet reality shows have broken into households and taken
everyone captive to support its cause which is a rather
meaningless one.
My
problem with all these shows is simply its likeness to
the original version created in the West. I mean surely
be different, at least change the name and logo! The
likeness is so obvious that even Stevie Wonder will
notice it, no offence to the great man though. Even
some Sri Lankan music is a complete clone of recent
Billboard hits, which is not the least bit acceptable.
It leaves me with the feeling of suffocation and quite
ashamed to be called a Sri Lankan.
Lack of vision
So
it’s a given that the shows are direct “me too’s” but
what happens to the winners? Well except for the one or
two who have taken their careers to the next step and
become poster boys, no one has really done anything
worth mentioning. This in itself shows the long-term
lack of vision and direction for the artiste provided by
the media that created them. Obviously these contestants
are simply a money making tool they intend benefiting
from, but have no desire to invest on, in order to take
their careers to higher levels, which can in the long
run gain higher financial returns as well.
Let’s
face it, all over the world the individuals taking part
in these contests are those that belong to the socio
economic groups of C2 and below, so immediate monetary
gain is on the top of the list of priorities.
Many
of the contestants have gone back to their day jobs,
while some others have looked to use their short term
popularity to lure fans from more affluent family
backgrounds, in order to get ahead in life and acquire
wealth. Startling as it may seem, yes folks that’s the
reality.
So this makes reality shows in Sri Lanka a perfect
breeding ground for gold diggers and a few with real
artistic dreams. So if you think of yourself as a gold
digger or a short term popularity seeker get yourself
registered for the next visionless reality show, since I
can bet my two cents, that it is coming soon..
A beacon of light fighting for
socio-political change in Maldives
|
Jennifer Latheef: The zealous champion |
By Dilrukshi Handunnetti
Jennifer Latheef is every bit the zealous champion. Her
life has been a commitment to public causes including
advocacy of human rights and championing political
causes.
A
woman who sees herself as an instrument of social
change, Latheef is a woman with burning zeal to ensure
socio-political change in her archipelago home. Today
her new cause is to fight child sexual abuse and to have
it criminalised in the
Maldives.
Having
played her distinctive role in challenging the previous
Maldivian administration, Latheef enjoys iconic status
as a human rights champion in her home. The one time
actress and photojournalist of the Minivan Daily who
later turned into a political activist is now ready to
dedicate herself to the cause of defending child rights.
Latheef grabbed headlines in 2003 when she was arrested
by the Maldivian authorities for her alleged commission
of an ‘act of terrorism.’ That also made her the most
famous Maldivian woman prisoner of conscience.
Her sin
Her
sin was, in Latheef’s words, to be the daughter of the
leader of the Maldivian Democratic Party (MDP) and to
have plucked up enough courage to mobilise people
against what she perceived to be state suppression
tactics to quell democratic opposition.
“But
that’s all in the past. I think a nation’s dignity is
demonstrated in the way they treat children. If there is
less exploitation of children and more access to
education, then that country is doing something right,”
remarks Latheef.
She
believes that in the Maldives, the main concerns are now
changing from political to social. “While political
turbulence may be a thing of the past, the islands still
have to deal with the sinister issue of child sex
abuse,” notes Latheef.
And
given the nexus between Sri Lanka and the Maldives,
Jennifer Latheef commutes between the countries, sharing
her goals and aspirations with Sri Lanka, a country she
considers her second home.
The
onetime Amnesty International declared prisoner of
conscience is now working to prevent child sex abuse and
calls it an ‘urgent need’ in the Maldives. “This
exploitation must stop, specially the sexual
exploitation.”
Helping local organisations
Currently, Latheef is in
Sri Lanka,
helping local organisations and individuals to do what
she does in furtherance of the rights of children with
the help of Maldivian students studying in Sri Lanka.
To
this end, the volunteer organisation NOOR, of which she
and her husband Abdulla are an integral part,
collaborates with the local organisations grappling with
the same social malady of having their young devastated
by sexually exploitative adults.
“During 30 years of dictatorship, this issue that ails
our society never truly surfaced. It was a topic
discussed in hushed tones. With a new government in
place, we are now calling for tougher laws and
criminalisation of the offence,” she notes. Latheef says
that according to Sharia Law, it is stipulated that two
eyewitnesses are required to convict a molester. So NOOR
advocates the publicising of the exploitative incidents
concealing the identities of victimised children to make
social pressure work against would be offenders.
“If
you wait for structural reforms and new laws, we will
have to wait till the cows come home. We now call for
new legislation complete with heavy penalties on
offenders,” she says.
Political goals
Her
campaigning work brings her often to Colombo. “In many
ways than one, we have been working from
Sri Lanka
to achieve our political goals back at home. This serves
as a base for advocacy and progressive work,” she adds.
Until
February 2008, the Maldivian practice was to banish
sexual abusers to an island. “That had a reverse effect
often. The offenders were more or less able to roam free
and even to abuse more children. But now, child abusers
are sentenced to a jail term.”
“The
Maldivians now want child abusers to be sentenced to
death. The existing legal regime is an outrage. To start
with, child sexual abuse is not a criminal offence in
the
Maldives.
When convicted, offenders are sentenced only for seven
years and often released before they have served their
full term. Once released they are back in the community
without being supervised,” she notes.
This
situation led Jennifer Latheef and 25 others to
volunteer their services to fight against child sexual
abuse. NOOR’s very first event was to stage a protest in
front of a convicted paedophile who is incidentally a
teacher. It is ironical that instead of calling for
action, parents told their offspring not to associate
with the abused children, thus ostracising them. “After
the protest, there was an opinion change. We sent a
message that public displeasure will be brought to their
doorstep if they indulge in outrageous acts such as
violating children.”
To help child victims
To
help child victims, Latheef adds that NOOR has the
services of two qualified counsellors.
During
Former President Gayoom’s tenure, Latheef and likeminded
others began a signature campaign to end child sexual
abuse. Despite 3,500 signatures being placed on a
citizens’ petition calling for fresh legislation in the
Maldives to protect children from child sexual abuse, it
fell on deaf ears.
“In
the
Maldives, it
takes 3,000 signatures even to register a political
party. Some presidential candidates polled less than
3,000 votes at the election. But our petition was simply
ignored,” she says claiming that she is in
Colombo
to study the legal system and work closely with child
rights activists.
Convicted paedophile
Latheef adds that the same infamous convicted paedophile
also signed the said petition when it was doing the
rounds. “I struck his name off. His signature would
defeat our purpose. This fight is against such people,”
Latheef adds with fire.
Now
there is a draft bill proposed by Parliamentarian
Mohamed Nasheed (Kutti Nasheed) that contains most
points advocated by NOOR. “But that too needs
improvement. We advocate that a convicted person should
not be allowed to work closely with children,” she
adds. While a walk against child abuse was undertaken
in Male attended by President Mohamed Nasheed, Latheef
is now meeting up with Sri Lankan activists,
non-governmental organisations and political
representatives who share her passion. “We do a lot of
brainstorming here. We also had a
Colombo
event recently geared towards creating awareness and
augmenting youth interest.”
The Maldivian students studying in Sri Lanka organised
the event held at Sapphire Hotel, Wellawatte. These
students work in close association with NOOR while
sharing their knowledge and interest with their Sri
Lankan counterparts.
Maha Karuna Society - Singapore and
SriLankan Cares assist government in efforts to help
IDPs
|
First Lady
Shiranthi Rajapaksa and
Namal Rajapakse with visiting members of
the Maha Karuna Society and Ven. Dr. K Gunarathana Thero of the Maha
Karuna Society Singapore |
SriLankan Cares, the Corporate Social Responsibility arm
of the national carrier, joined in the government’s
efforts to help the nearly 300,000 internally displaced
people in the
Northern Province
to get back on their feet.
The
Maha Karuna Society of
Singapore,
who had generously collected more than a tonne (1,000
kilogrammes) of relief items for the IDPs in the
Northern Province contacted Sri Lankan Cares Trust to
facilitate the distribution of these items to the people
in the various camps in the north.
The
Founder of the Maha Karuna Society Ven. Dr. K.
Gunarathana Thero who conducted a long campaign in
Singapore to collect these items which included
wheelchairs, medicines, children’s clothes and slippers,
toothpaste, biscuits, stationary, and toys from members
of the Maha Karuna Society and Sri Lankans and
Singaporeans in Singapore.
SriLankan Airlines assisted the Maha Karuna Society in
airlifting the items free of charge to
Colombo, and SriLankan Cares arranged for the transportation of
the items to the north.
With
the assistance of the airline’s chairman who is also the
chairman of SriLankan Cares Trust two truck loads of
these items were presented to First Lady Shiranthi
Rajapakse. She was on an in-depth inspection of the
camps as part of the Tharunyata Hetak project headed by
Namal Rajapakse. The SL Cares team assisted the
Tharunyata Hetak project by distributing the relief
items in all of the zones, especially Zones 1 and 5 in
the Menik Farm IDP camp complex.
The
national carrier in May donated thousands of packets of
milk powder to the residents of Menik Farm, purchased
through donations from its employees.
 Asia
Media Report 2009 launched in Colombo
The
Asia Media Report 2009 had its Colombo launch on August
4 at the Galle Face Hotel.
The
report includes 20 chapters on the media status of
various countries in the region and was edited by former
Times of India, Mumbai Editor Darryl d’ Monte.
Picture shows writer of the chapter on Sri Lanka
Dilrukshi Handunnetti handing over the first copy of the
Asia Media Report 2009 to the chief guest at the
ceremony Chairman, Vijitha Yapa Associates and veteran
journalist, Vijitha Yapa.
Ramazan Bazaar
The
annual Ramazan Bazaar of the Young Women’s Muslim League
will be held on August 15, from 10 am onwards at their
headquarters at No 9/1, Robert Gunawardena Mawatha,
Kirulapone, Colombo 6.
There
will be stalls displaying salwar kameez, sarees,
footwear, food both aneous trade stalls and many
bargains. Nestle and MD products will be sold at special
rates. All are welcome.
The
proceeds of this bazaar would be utilized for the annual
Ramazan hampers to be distributed to the needy families
during the holy month of Ramazan.
The
YMWL has many ongoing projects, they are:
A day
care center for children of poor working mothers.
Maintenance of a female surgical ward at the Kalubowila
Government Teaching Hospital.
Tsunami relief work both in the Eastern and Southern
Province of Sri Lanka.
Educational Trust Fund to the deserving undergraduates
of national universities.
A
project together with Muslim Aid providing nutritious
lunches and kola kenda as well as computer, dressmaking
and embroidery classes for the people of the area.
Fight aging naturally
Fighting the aging process doesn’t have to involve
spending a lot of money or subjecting yourself to
needles and lasers. Here are some simple, natural ways
to look younger and feel better at the same time!
Step 1 Try taking omega-3 fish oil supplements to
help get healthy hair and soft skin. Another benefit is
the improvement to your heart and immune functions.
Step 2 Avoid hair cuts that are all one length since
this will give the appearance of droopiness. Instead,
wear your hair layered around your face to visually lift
your features.
Step 3
Add a
handful of white sugar with a mild cleanser when you
shower. Rub all over your face and body for smooth
feeling skin.
Step 4 Watch what you eat! Instead of eating
processed sugar which speeds up the aging process, make
sure to include lots of fruits and veggies in your diet.
Step 5 Your hands can also show signs of aging, so
don’t forget to take care of them as well. Whenever you
use a mask on your face or exfoliate, use the same thing
on your hands.
Step 6
Instead of wearing foundation and powder which tends to
settle into wrinkles, use a concealer only where you
need it. Then smooth a tinted moisturiser all over your
face.
Step 7
Be
extra diligent in treating the delicate skin around your
eyes. Use a gel formula made especially for this area
instead of face cream. You can even put a little bit of
the eye gel on the tips of your eyelashes to keep them
healthy.
Humour
“Great” news
The
newlywed wife said to her husband when he returned from
work, “I have great news for you. Pretty soon, we’re
going to be three in this house instead of two.”
Her
husband ran to her with a smile on his face and delight
in his eyes.
He was
glowing of happiness and kissing his wife when she said,
“I’m glad that you feel this way since tomorrow morning,
my mother moves in with us.”
Why can’t you be like that?
Jill
tells her husband, “Jack, that young couple that just
moved in next door seem such a loving twosome. Every
morning, when he leaves the house, he kisses her
goodbye, and every evening when he comes homes, he
brings her a dozen roses.
Now,
why can’t you do that?”
“Gosh,” Jack says, “why I hardly know the girl.”
Problems from the start
John
got off the elevator on the 50th floor and nervously
knocked on his blind date’s door. She opened it and was
as beautiful and charming as everyone had said.
“I’ll
be ready in a few minutes,” she said. “Why don’t you
play with Spot, my dog, while you’re waiting?” “He does
wonderful tricks. He rolls over, shakes hands, sits up
and if you make a hoop with your arms, he’ll jump
through.”
The
dog followed John onto the balcony and started rolling
over. John made a hoop with his arms and Spot jumped
through — over the balcony railing. Just then John’s
date walked out.
“Isn’t
Spot the cutest, happiest dog you’ve ever seen?”
“To
tell the the truth,” he replied, “Spot seemed a little
depressed to me!”
Marry Jones
Old
Farmer Johnson was dying. The family was standing around
his bed. With a low voice he sad to his wife: “When I’m
dead I want you to marry farmer Jones.”
Wife:
“No, I can’t marry anyone after you.”
Johnson: “But I want you to.”
Wife:
“But why?”
Johnson: “Jones once cheated me in a horse deal!”
Perfect mate
At a
local coffee bar, a young woman was expounding on her
idea of the perfect mate to some of her friends.
“The
man I marry must be a shining light amongst company. He
must be musical. Tell jokes. Sing. And stay home at
night!”
An old
granny overheard and spoke up, “Honey, if that’s all you
want, get a TV!”
Birthday bonus
A
fellow was very much in love with a beautiful girl. One
day she told him that the next day was her birthday. He
told her he would send her a bouquet of roses... one for
each year of her life.
That
evening he called the local florist and ordered 21 roses
with instructions that they be delivered first thing the
next morning.
As the
florist was preparing the order, he decided that since
the young man was such a good customer, he would put an
extra dozen roses in the bouquet.
The
fellow never did find out what made the young girl so
angry with him.
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